The initial meeting gives all participants the opportunity to relate their problems and concerns, to became acquainted with the difficulties of the others and to say what they expect of the self help group.

Frequently, the members of a self help group will find out for the first time that are faced with very similar burdens because they share the same problem.

Besides presenting their own problem situations, the participants also discuss questions about the group and its organisation.

There are three questions about the group to which some answers should be found during the initial meeting.

The first of these is:

What do we wish to achieve in the group?

Some of the possible answers are: exchange of experience, mutual help, concerted advice and counselling on specific questions, receive and/or produce informational materials, moral support and stabilisation in a difficult life situation.

This should be followed by the question of

Who can become a member of the group?

Among the conceivable answers would be: only persons affected themselves in a similar way; only those affected plus family members; or only those affected, family members and professionals should participate in the group sessions.

Then there is the question of

How large or small may the group become and what should happen if too many or too few people want to participate?

If the group becomes too small (3 or fewer persons) there are the options of advertising for more members from the public and of discontinuing the group.

If the group becomes too large (20 and more participants) there are the options of splitting into two groups, not accepting further members until there is room again (closed group), or even of looking for a sufficiently large room or hall so that everyone can be accommodated after all.

The answers to these questions depends very much on the group’s topic and the expectations of the participants. It is recommended that the decisions made at the beginning of the group process not be excessively narrow.

The organisational questions to be clarified are: 

• On which days, at which times of day, with which frequency and in which place does the group wish to meet in future?
• Should there be a membership list, and if so, which information should it contain and for which purposes may this information be used? (e.g.  mailing invitations, informational material, car pools, contacts outside the group meetings).
• Who should keep the membership list?
• Who takes care of the preparations for the group meetings? (coffee, beverages, etc.)
• Who should serve as treasurer for the group (collect money, pay for the room, etc.).
• Who should serve as contact person or group speaker in reference to the outside world (e.g. for the self help contact office, questions by the news media and other interested persons).
• Who should be available as contact persons for new members? Many people who are interested in the group’s topic would like more exact information about the group before attending any of its meetings. They might want to know how large the group is, or the age structure, etc. The self help contact offices do not generally have all this information and can therefore only give limited answers to these and other questions. Then it is good if they can refer the interested party to a contact person.

Many self help groups start their initial meeting with a round of self introductions. Each person states his or her name (first and/or last names) and explains the personal situation, the current difficulties, and expectations and wishes placed on the self help group.

Motivation for working in a self help group is frequently related to the following general expectations and beliefs:

• Finding appreciation of his or her own problems
• Experiencing recognition
• Sensing emotional support
• Overcoming isolation
• Obtaining concrete suggestions
• Undertaking joint activities, or
• Joint representation of interests and concerns in respect to and demands to be placed on health and social services (lobbying).

When the introductions are over, a conversation often develops on the current life situations and personal burdens of the individuals present. Similarities and differences are discovered and one sees oneself in the others.

Everyone should have a chance to speak and be able to express his or her own wishes and expectations. Only in this way can disappointments be avoided. But it is also important to be able to listen to the other participants. What have they got to say? How can I learn from them? The notion of tolerance for those who think differently is of fundamental importance for the group process.

The last 15 minutes or so should be reserved for a snapshot. Each person should have the opportunity to state briefly what pleased him or her, what was good about the meeting, and also what he or she felt was missing. At the first meeting one might also say whether one will be attending the next meeting.

This is a good method to make the group happenings transparent and to compare one’s own impressions with those of the others present.

During the first meeting it is helpful to communicate about the fundamentals of the work in self help groups. The basic laws selected by the group should then be deemed as binding for the work in the group.

The group decides for itself whether it is currently open or closed; i.e. whether or not new members can be accepted at the present time.

In many cases, large fluctuations in membership can impact the development of an otherwise stable group. Then the persons who have been there since the beginning might easily get the impression that they are not progressing or are not able to work on certain subjects with the concentration that these deserve. In such situations it has been most helpful to declare that the group is closed and not to admit any more new members for a certain period of time.

There is also the situation in which a group has reached an optimum size and resolves to work together in this constellation without admitting new members.

But sometimes a self help group, especially if it is young, has to struggle with the problem that people have been staying away. At the first meeting it was 15 people but at the third meeting it was only 5. In this situation there is an obvious interest in keeping the group open to new members.